Contributed by Josie Cardona
We had been married for a year, after dating for 2 years. Like all newlyweds, we were going through a period of adjustment. We didn’t argue constantly but we did have a few differences and it was difficult to understand each other. Once I became annoyed, I would carry that frustration for a few days. Even though I didn’t like feeling this way, I didn’t want to make up too easily-I wanted to make him feel guilty.
One Saturday morning we had gone shopping because we had a commitment in the evening. Excited and happy, we arrived home and began to get ready; me with my new dress, I was six months pregnant, and him with his coat and tie. Just as we were about to leave I noticed the light in the kitchen ceiling was still on. I took a few steps to turn it off when my husband stopped me. “No, my love, I’ll do it,” he said as he gently pushed me out of the way, adjusted the knot on his tie and went to solve the problem. Before I continue, let me remind you that this happened many years ago. The kitchen light had a cord you needed to pull, there were no switches on the wall. When he pulled the cord, the lampshade came loose and fell on his head. I started laughing immediately after hearing his “ay” and watching him rubbing his head. I wanted to tell him to be still as the shade had shattered and there was glass all over the floor but I couldn’t because I was laughing so hard…until he turned towards me. I froze! The blood was running down his face all over his clothes and he was swaying from side to side. I started trembling and running around in circles like crazy not knowing what to do. A thousand thoughts went through my mind. ‘It could have been me. My baby! Oh, God, what should I do? Where’s the phone? Will the ambulance get here in time? He’s got to be alright!’ I ran towards him to see how I could help. I ran to get a towel to see how I could stop the bleeding. He grabbed the towel from me and began to wipe his head and face. When he was done wiping his face we noticed that, thank God, it was nothing serious, just a few scratches from the glass as the shade had shattered on his head. But what a fright!!!
We didn’t get to go to our commitment. If I remember correctly, after cleaning up all the mess, we spent the evening laughing at the unexpected event. Reflecting back, I think that after seeing him injured, my heart had stopped, believing that it was something serious. I realized how tender he would always be with me; how he would take care of me; how he worried about me; how he would protect me. You know what? After this, I don’t think that we had silly little spats. There were times when we would argue about insignificant, petty little things. But I saw how valuable life is and to have someone that loves you and takes care of you the way he cared for me. I saw the wonderful and positive in him rather than seeing his faults. Today, 37 years later, he still has faults, but how nice it feels to have him close to me, taking care of me, protecting me and loving me-in spite of my own faults. He’s perfect for me!
Many times we are so disoriented that we have to get bumped on the head to see what we have right in front of us. But then it all depends on how we receive and react to these bumps. Through life’s bumps we learn to value what we have. Let’s not focus on our spouses’ faults or negative points. This impedes growth in the relationship. Don’t waste your time in petty little things and take advantage of all that you can share together. Consider the love you have for each other, the tenderness, the delicate moments, the care, attention, security, and the value of your commitment. That is a champion marriage. That is everlasting love in a relationship.